Peer Pressured Into Blogging

It's a new year, it's a new time, it's a new world

2010-02-08T21:45:00.002-06:00

I cannot believe I have not written on this blog in a year. It seemed futile. I don't think anyone was reading them anymore anyway. The main reason I stopped writing was because in the past year I went through some pretty intensive training to become an online associate professor for the University of Phoenix Axia College. Since the training, I have been teaching anywhere from 2-5 classes ALL the time! Right now I am doing 3. And besides...I forgot my password.

But here I am. No longer yearning for a grandchild, but the proud Mimi of one little darling born on December 10, 2009 named Olivia Anne McLarty. My daughter is an amazingly good mother - just as I knew she would be. Greg is a dream dad. I only wish my children would have had that when they were born. He loves his little girl!

Olivia has 2 grandmothers (so I am Mimi), 3 great- grandmothers and 3 grandfathers and 2 great grandfathers. She also has 7 uncles! SEVEN! No aunts yet as Greg is the only one married. Jeff was married so she had an aunt, but that didn't work out so she only has uncles. I feel for her when she wants to date!

I have been very politically active for the past couple of years which has alienated some of my family members, but that's ok. None of them will discuss politics with me. Perhaps because I have facts to back up what I say and the don't - well they do have Bill O'Reilly and FOX news - the most biased cable news network in the world. What we call the idiot box is their source of information. I prefer books and documentaries and actually reading the material being proposed to make my decisions. I don't let morons like O'Reilly tell me how to think. I used to be a liberal conservative, but the more right wing extremist that members of my family get, the more left wing extremist I get. Both my boys and daughter are liberals also, but more conservative than I am - can you believe it? Me and old age really have an opinion and are not afraid to use it!

So as we count down the Mayan calendar, and the New World Order events continue to fall into place, I guess I will attempt, at least from time to time, to post something here. Go into my archives for postings that might interest you. I had a better attitude about the world but then Bush killed it just like he killed all our American serviceman. Why didn't his twins go into the military and go to Iraq? I think he should have been able to do that without worry since he could send anyone else's children over there. Thank God Obama is getting us out of Iraq by August.

Until next time when I truly have something to say...

The New World Order is Here - reposted - my original posting was done on July 9, 2007

2009-01-01T02:27:00.002-06:00

Although this is a very difficult video to watch - I strongly recommend that you do and that you think about what it says and means, even if you decide that you don't believe it. Just be aware of this and as you watch world events unfold, it may help you decide who you will vote into office in 2008. It does not endorse ANY candidates or either party. But it is information all true AMERICANS need to hear.

The Commercialism of Christmas

2008-12-22T22:37:00.002-06:00

I don't like Christmas anymore. I used to love it. But trying to buy presents for 2 sets of parents whose houses are full and overflowing, who have every thing in the world that they want, is impossible. I don't know what to give my grown children. I haven't picked out their clothes since they were 10 years old. When your kids are in their late 20's and early 30's and you have no grandchildren, there is just not much drive to shop.

When the kids lived at home - whole different story. I really wanted to make them great memories. The nights I stayed up all night putting toys together; the days I spent in the kitchen making and decorating sugar cookies or making fudge and cakes and all those Christmas goodies; putting up 4 or 5 trees throughout the house plus a Santa Claus collection exceeding 100 Santas and tons of other decorations as well; the times outside putting lights up and making cedar trees into outside Christmas trees - all of those times are just over. There is no longer a point to it. We live in the middle of nowhere next to nothing.

I guess I am a scrooge in a way except that I am very generous with the amounts that I do give those I give gifts to. The greatest invention ever was the gift card.

It does not seem to have any meaning because it has been commercialized into the ground. I hear the stores are crowded. I wouldn't know. I have not set foot in one for weeks now.

My husband decided he wants a new TV for Christmas. He has a big screen TV that is only about 5 years old right now. It is perfectly fine. Why he wants a new one when there is nothing wrong with this one and as expensive as they are, well, I guess that must just be a man thing. He waited until today, December 22, to ask me what I would like for Christmas. Uh.....no idea and it's probably a little late to shop without being mobbed and possibly injured.

So far this year I have boycotted New Year's, Valentine's Day, Easter, Memorial Day, 4th of July, Memorial Day, Halloween, and almost thanksgiving - but I went to my son in law's mother's house for that. I would boycott Christmas completely except my in laws decided they were coming up here. I do hope my son driving in from Albuquerque gets here before they do so I can spend at least a little time alone with him, but I doubt that. Always when he is here, someone else is here the entire time as well.

Oh and the main thing I am boycotting as a self described scrooge - my birthday. Sure they are fun when you are little, but like Christmas, you reach a point where they are just downright depressing! Can I have do overs? Coz I would do it all over completely differently!

Obama/McCain Dance Off - this is well done for a hoax video!

2008-12-22T22:34:00.002-06:00

Obama/ McCain Dance Off

This is Declan Galbraith at age 15 - Ego You

2008-12-21T03:34:00.003-06:00

Born in 1991, Declan Galbraith has numerous videos on U-Tube. His voice changed at age 14. He was 15 in this video. Be sure you listen to the one below this when he was just 11 years old. Incredible passion in his singing! To watch this video, simply click on the title to this post.

This is Declan Galbraith at age 11 - Tell me why!

2008-12-19T23:10:00.001-06:00

Pilobolus - AMAZING!

2008-09-30T23:30:00.001-05:00

Native American Music Awards

2008-08-28T04:37:00.003-05:00

Please help support our few Native American Musicians who are carrying their tradtionally music into the 21st century. May it never be lost! It's easy and you can help! Click on the title to go to the page.

Tenth Annual Awards Saturday, October 4th, 2008
Seneca Niagara Casino & Hotel Niagara Falls, NY
Over 30 Voting Categories!
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COOKIES MUST BE ENABLED
Only one complete voting ballot cast per computer
Public voting now requires a registered email address and a complete voting ballot.
Please register and log on

Kite surfer gets caught by plane

2008-08-16T01:36:00.001-05:00

The deaths of classmates

2008-08-13T03:38:00.004-05:00

Getting older is just a fact of life. This year is the 35th anniversary of my graduation from high school. Numerous people got hold of me, but I cannot go because it is being held on the same weekend that my daughter is getting married in Tulsa.

The thing that struck me when I went to check out the website for it though, was the list of people that have died since we graduated. I can remember nearly all of them and some of them I had gone to school with from grade school through senior year. There are still a couple hundred students that have not been found from my graduating class, so the numbers may be much higher. Rest in Peace...

Lynda Becker Pitcher
Hope May Mason
Rita Burch
Dwight McWilliams
Barry Cotton
Felix Monroe
Jonathan Cross
Margaret Montgomery
Mary Foreman
James Neighbors
Dwight Harp
Richard Southerland
James Hendrick
Tammie Sullins
David Hess
Jana Troullier
Steve Hester
Pedro Velez
Bobby Hornbeck
Debbie Wilson Barker
Albert Anuska
Kent Ferris

I can still see most of their faces at 17 or 18 years old just as if it was yesterday, yet some of them, like Pedro Velez, died right after graduation and have been gone over 30 years already. Life is strange - who dies young and who doesn't...

SECRET PLACES OF THE EARTH

2008-07-05T02:33:00.003-05:00

Although it is generally believed that most of these have been photoshopped in, it is still interesting to see how close satellites can get to the earth and take pictures. There is no privacy left in the world!

Truly talented children!

2008-07-05T01:39:00.002-05:00

11 year old Bianca sings!

6 year old Connie sings!

Cheeky Monkeys ( 8 & 9 year olds) Amazing!

2008-07-05T01:29:00.001-05:00

Lost Friends

2008-07-03T00:46:00.002-05:00

I guess I am the world's worst about keeping track of friends. I just don't do it. The people that I hung out with for the first 35 years of my life I never see anymore with the exception of one person. Then, I lived in another town for 9 years. Made a lot of friends there. But I have been here for 9 years and I simply do not have any contact with the friends I had there. It is sort of out of sight, out of mind. I know at first it was because I was so busy raising kids, working, etc... These last nine years I worked two jobs and had no time for friends. Sure we had the occasional party and the college kids after they were all 21 hung out at our house many weekends. They came from OU, OSU, NSU, Connors, and other colleges and then they all got into their late 20's and they have kids now and it's too hard to get together like that.

Everything is temporary if you give it enough time. Or at least that is what Jewel says. I tried to get in touch with a friend I had in high school. We are having our 35 year reunion in September but it is the same weekend that my daughter is getting married so I won't be going to that. Probably wouldn't go anyway. But, as I said, I have tried to get hold of the one person from high school that I had a friendship that lasted up into our late 30's before she moved out of state. She is being like me. Not interested. Too much time has passed. She is a right wing republican and I am a semi conservative democrat. She has a whole passel of grandkids and I have none. I had to face the fact that anything in common we ever did share we no longer do. I saw a picture of her. She has had enough face lifts and botox that she looks like she is stretched tight and doesn't look anything like the way I remember her. I still have all my original wrinkles.

I feel my age. The biggest thing on my calendar is doctor's appointments and I am still not diagnosed. Soon it will be a year since I have been trying to find the source of my problem so we could FIX it. I have had so many needles stuck into arms, legs,hips, back, etc.... I have had every spinal injection they can do and none of it has worked. Next Friday I go into the Spine Hospital again. This time for a spinal tap and Cat-Scan with contrast and on a tilting board to view the spine in as many positions as possible. It seems that something is hiding behind the bones and does not show up in MRI's. The spinal fluid is also something they will test.

I used a cane for awhile. Today I had to use a wheelchair. I really don't want this to be a permanent thing. I have been going to the Pain Management Center for months now. I go there in pain, they inflict more pain on me, and then they ask me how I am managing. I see now how they got that name.

I don't like drugs. I don't like narcotics or pain pills. I may have to start taking them just to function. It won't be me anymore. My body is wearing out before my mind. Sometimes I think it would be much better if it was the other way around....

My Anti-Mexican email propoganda rant

2008-06-13T02:41:00.002-05:00

I would like to state an opinion (as far as I know I still have that right as an American - maybe not) and it is just my opinion. It doesn't matter to me if you agree with it or not. It would just be nice if, for once, people could look at this issue from a slightly different angle for a change! I guess your ability to read this and contemplate it will be something of a test of how open or closed minded you are. No one can make you believe anything you don't want to believe or force you to change your position on an issue. But I have not seen anything but negativity and anti Mexican forwards on the Internet and I think it only fair that we consider this "problem" from outside the box.

Let me offer a more sensible solution for the immigration problems than the downright ugly and totally racist ones I have read that go around the Internet. I was just thinking that it has been over 2 years and most of New Orleans looks just like it did when Hurricane Katrina hit. It's a wreck and what has FEMA done? Well, we don't see reports on the news of all their amazing progress do we? What we need to do is fire all of the FEMA administration, and start over. Perhaps we could hire Carlos Mencia as the head of the new FEMA.

Let's change FEMA to Find Every Mexican Available and put them to work in New Orleans with clean up and if the government is not going to rebuild the levies then they just need to say so and then let the new FEMA know where the end boundary is and let them rebuild all those homes for the rest of New Orleans and all the other coastal cities devastated and just think of the money we will save coz we sure don't pay Mexican workers even minimum wage now do we? However, right now your tax dollars are going to that area, but nothing is getting done because it is caught up in beaurocratic red tape and a top heavy administration.

When we built that house in Guymon, we went to a huge tree sale in Norman and bought about 15 pine trees. They were huge. Way too big for Rodney to dig. Trying to find anyone to do the work was impossible and the trees just sat there needing to be planted very badly. Rodney was watering them everyday trying to keep them alive. We tried the employment office and word of mouth and no one was interested in doing the work until we found a group of Mexicans. They did not speak English. HOWEVER, there were 4 of them and they dug ALL 15 holes right where I wanted them and as deep as I wanted them and as wide as I wanted them because I showed them with a tape measure and hand gestures. And they got those trees planted. Not only that, but they did it in one day and I did pay over minimum wage. Every Mexican I have ever had work for me has been an incredibly hard worker. And I can honestly say they are also far superior to others I have paid for day labor.

People love to attack the Mexican workers who come here and pick crops and do hard manual labor, but I seem to get those emails mostly from people who wouldn't be caught dead doing the work that Mexicans are doing in this country. A review of American history shows that the infrastructure of this country was largely built on slave labor and our railroads by the Chinese who died in vast numbers due to the dangerous working conditions. If you don't recall this, find a current American history book because the old ones glossed over the facts and the newer ones are more likely to be at least halfway honest.

During the depression it was the uneducated who worked for the WPA and built so many of our roads, bridges, national guard armories, etc.... and again for very low wages. Hard and dangerous work, low pay, but people so desperate to put food on the table for their families that they did it. Many had to move around to follow jobs, leaving children moving from school to school, or dropping out altogether.

And now it is the Mexicans doing the work no one else will do, and true to our ancestors and their attitudes, we put them down and complain about them and talk about building a big fence to keep them out. That's the dumbest idea I have ever heard, but it won't surprise me if our government spends billions of dollars doing just that. Duh! Ever heard of wire cutters? Or are they going to have the national guard stand shoulder to shoulder across the entire Mexican border? Oh wait. They can't do that! Our National Guard is no longer in THIS country to guard our nation. It is in Iraq and Afghanistan. Our Coast Guard has even sent Coast Guard Cutters to that region and I always thought the point of the U.S. Coast Guard was to guard OUR coasts! Silly me! Instead, let's try to keep all those Mexicans out. Well, enjoy it when food prices quadruple along with gas and everything else. This won't affect the rich and powerful. They have no need to be concerned. But this will affect me and possibly you (unless you are one of the rich and powerful - and if so, how come I don't know this?)

People can make all sorts of claims about what a drain the illegal Mexicans are on this country, but our prisons, the homeless, the drug addicts, gangs (especially in big city schools), and the welfare system are far worse! It is predicted that by the time I am of age (as a baby boomer) to draw Social Security, they will not have the money to meet the needs of all the eligible baby boomers. Our government is not too good with budgets or the concept of national debt.

Our government makes those rules about illegal immigrants and that very same government also passed the Patriot Act in the middle of the night right after they lied about the "weapons of mass destruction" that we were going to find in Iraq. Man, for a place that is all sand, they sure are good at hiding stuff! They still can't find Bin Laden. Are we that inept? Why do you think Colin Powell refused to serve in Bush Junior's second administration? Going into the 6th year of this "war" and watching the national debt climb higher and higher along with the price of gas, and desperate Mexicans trying to feed their families and risk their lives to come here to pick lettuce for 12 hours a day in the heat for low wages, and the best injustice we can come up with in light of the huge MESS we have gotten into over the past 6 years is to badger illegal immigrants? I think there are far more pressing issues.

Well, the truth is, everyone who is NOT Native American is an immigrant and Ellis Island is just a little bit out of the way for Mexicans. In my current American Literature textbook, from which I teach, it states that around the time of Columbus there were approximately 25 million Indians here. Today there are only 2 million and half of them live on reservations in poverty conditions. No, we didn't kill all of them with bullets. We killed them with diseases we brought over to this continent like smallpox and diphtheria. Nope, antibiotics had not yet been invented. Our history is not all that pretty if you really study it. Of course, things like Vietnam, the truth about slavery, the annihilation of the Native American Indian, and even the FIRST Korean War are barely a footnote in history books because we don't like to publish our failures. One can only wonder how Americans (if the country survives another century) will view this time in which we live.

Last summer I went to New York City and out to the Statue of Liberty. It says, "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door." Well! Does it say anywhere EXCEPT FOR MEXICANS? No - and I read it TWICE.

Ellis Island, which was the arrival point for European immigrants, is part of the Statue of Liberty National Monument. Between 1892 and 1924, more than 22 million passengers saw the Statue of Liberty as they passed through Ellis Island and the Port of New York. This landmark of freedom became a National Monument in 1924 and a major tourist attraction in the 20th Century. They settled in different areas in the East and that's why you still have places today like China Town, or areas with lots of German speaking Americans, etc... but that's ok with us. As long as it is not Spanish! It's actually quite interesting to me that English became the national language since Columbus and many of the earlier explorers of America were from Spain and spoke Spanish...but I digress.

Do you believe in the U.S. Constitution, the amendments, democracy, the preamble and the words engraved on the Statue of Liberty? If so, then stop bashing the tired, poor, huddled masses of Mexicans trying to survive and feed their families. They don't want to be illegal - but it is very difficult to gain citizenship. It is far easier to marry or divorce, take flying lessons without the need to learn how to land the plane, or even to go out of the country and adopt a HUMAN baby, than to gain citizenship.

For decades we have had Arabs attend our colleges and some have trained at Flight schools. Isn't that more of an issue and problem than Jose and Juanita who ran in the night across the river in hopes of a better life with no plans of flying planes into tall American buildings?

And yes, I think there should be ONE language in this country and it should be English, but I also just read a sewing pattern written in 6 different languages. I think the workers should be able to get work VISAs without jumping through a million hoops written in a foreign language to them, and yes I see how the GOVERNMENT has got the whole thing screwed up with giving too much aid, medical and otherwise, pretty similar to the way the welfare system is all screwed up too. But keep this in mind. OUR government made those laws! People blame Mexicans for taking advantage of the benefits offered them if illegal, but they are not the ones who passed those laws. It was the people who WE voted into office! Bashing the Mexicans for our idiotic governmental laws is like killing the messenger. It makes absolutely no sense to me. We have to share the blame for voting the wrong people into thousands of elected offices.

Many of us live in luxury compared to our ancestors, but we sit back in our overweight bodies because we have plenty to eat, and sit at our thousand dollar computers and forward to all our friends all this anti Mexican mumbo jumbo completely out of context to all the other government waste that also exists as if it is the only problem. The truth is that as much as you send those around the Internet over and over again, change has to come from within. Our government has to change laws and make them equitable and fair. The entire justice system needs to be revamped and don't even get me started on the IRS! But if we are going to shut off Mexican immigration, then why not Canadian immigration? And if so, don't you think someone should be up there on the Statue of Liberty sanding off the words of hope it offers and change them to - GO AWAY - we don't want anymore immigrants! So much for the whole concept of liberty. Let us not also be known as hypocrites in the 21st century along with the other shames of our history. Being proud to be an American is an admirable thing - especially considering that we must forgive our forefathers for the wrongs done to people of many races. Today you see ads on TV that say "tobacco stops with me." It would be nice if intolerance could stop with "us" and the U.S.

Currently reading :
Immigration Law and Procedure in a Nutshell (Nutshell Series)
By David S. Weissbrodt

Free Hugs Campaign - U-tube video of the year 2006

2008-04-15T02:46:00.001-05:00

Airplane interferes with commute!

2008-04-15T02:18:00.001-05:00

Operation MySpace - for the troops in Iraq

2008-04-12T14:40:00.000-05:00

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=261632808

End of the world?

2008-04-08T00:53:00.002-05:00

I truly am afraid if McCain gets into power that this is a sight that we will see in the next four years.
ATOMIC BOMB

Best Classified Ad ever!

2008-03-22T10:55:00.002-06:00

To Those Who Have A Loved One at War

2008-03-17T00:08:00.002-06:00

US Government Immorality will lead to bankruptcy

2008-03-10T13:14:00.001-06:00

Middle Aged Woman

2008-03-08T23:58:00.001-06:00

Major changes since my last entry!

2008-03-08T23:05:00.003-06:00

I have not had the heart to post to this blog since my last entry. Little did I know that day last August that in just a few days an event would occur that would profoundly affect my entire life and turn it upside down. I read that last blog and thought- wow I was talking about such trivial things!

On August 14, 2007, I was inside the house getting ready to take my dog, Sam, into town to see the vet when the phone rang. It was one of those phone calls you NEVER want to receive. One of my neighbors, who is on the same rural water board as my husband, was on the other end and the first thing he said was that my husband had experienced some kind of "episode." They were at the resort close to our home at a board members training session. HR had ridden his motorcycle there. The neighbor told me that an ambulance had already been called. I hung up and jumped in my car and headed to the resort and passed the ambulance on the way, so I turned around and followed it into the nearest town where they took him into the ER.

The moment I saw him and approached him and tried to talk to him I KNEW that he had suffered a stroke. Everyone was running tests on him talking about heat strokes and other things but I KNEW it was a stroke and I told the doctor it had to be. He was then taken by another ambulance to a hospital in Tulsa where the stroke was confirmed. He was in the hospital for about 7 or 8 days.

I have not been able to put this into words in the past 6 months since this happened because it has been too hard. I have seen the MRI pictures. I actually have them. The neurologist said it was a huge stroke that hit two different areas of the brain. His vision is very impaired and we have tried every specialist we can find but there is nothing that can be done. It also affected his memory of names of things and people. He can describe someone he has known all his life but cannot put a name to them at all. It affected his personality too. He was always one of the most self-assured, confident, intelligent, laid back people I have ever known. He is still very intelligent, but the confidence and self-assurance is gone and has not returned. He is something of a shell of how he used to be. I have already had to grieve the loss of the man I knew and try to get to know the one who has taken his place in my life.

He worries constantly that he is saying or doing the wrong thing. Although he has improved some since this happened, he is probably now as recovered from that as he ever will be. But that is not the end of the story.

On September 18 he began to tell me that his stomach hurt. He couldn't describe how it felt - just that it felt weird. I told him he had to see a doctor. By the 20th he was in enough pain to let me take him to the ER in Wagoner and they did a Cat Scan and sent him immediately to Tulsa.

I can't discuss the details of the events between Sept 20 and 23 because of a possible lawsuit, but let me just say this. He had a ruptured appendix from the time we took him in until 60 hours later when they finally took him to surgery. The surgeon told me he was surprised that he had lived that long. They had to clean out the entire abdominal cavity because of the poison. Never in my life have I seen anyone suffer as much, be in as much pain, or nearly die because of a misdiagnosis at one of the supposedly BEST hospitals in Tulsa.

The big problem with a ruptured appendix is that they cannot just take it out and sew the patient up. They do internal sutures and leave the rest open so it can heal from the inside out via a wound vac that is attached to the would. Two days after this surgery he suddenly felt wet all over. I checked him and one of his internal sutures had broken and part of his intestines were outside of the opening and bodily fluids were soaking him and the bed. The surgeon was called and arrived within minutes and I watched him actually stick his hand into Rodney's wound to push the intestines back in and put a temporary strap bandage on him and back to surgery he went.

This was a 10 day stay in the hospital and 4 weeks of home health nurses coming every other day to change the dressings on the wound vac. Once it was close to the outer skin, I was trained on how to change the wet to dry dressings until it completely healed which took about another month. Now, this man has been to hell and back for about 4 months by that point. I am happy to say that right now he seems to feel really well and he spends most of his time working and taking care of me because I fell apart right after all this ended.

I have degenerative disk disease. I was born with scoliosis and in the past few months it has limited my ability to walk. I can only walk very short distances with the use of a cane. I see a neurologist in a few weeks to determine if I am a candidate for surgery or not. I have not been in the past. The type of scoliosis I have makes surgeons hesitant to operate because the curvature is at the base of my spine and the spinal fluid follows it in an unnatural way. There is the chance of paralyzing me in surgery. So...another decision to make.

On September 18, just a couple days before he had his appendectomy, I quit smoking. I stayed quit through all that stress - but in the process, I gained a lot of weight really fast and there is a chance that the extra weight is putting pressure on a nerve causing this and if I can get the weight off then I will be able to walk again. I am trying, but not being able to exercise at all has made it very difficult. Also, I have had the steroid shots in my back a few times and I take two medications for myback and ALL of these cause weight gain. I am unable to work full time now. I teach part time for the University of Phoenix and have just been asked to be a faculty reviewer of student essays, which is all done online and I am contemplating this, but if I have surgery, it will have to wait.

I have decided that getting old sucks and I don't see why anyone would want to live a long life. At the time that I quit smoking, I was thinking that in a few months I would feel so much better! NO. I feel worse and worse all the time. We have spent a fortune on doctors, hospital bills, specialists, tests, etc... between us in the past 6 months. Rodney was told he absolutely must stop smoking but he hasn't. He says he does not have the will power. On March 18 I will be smoke free for half a year! That is a huge accomplishment for me, but hard to celebrate when I am in pain so much of the time and confined like I am now.

I keep telling myself that we will look back on this some day and talk about how bad it was and we will be better because after all, everything is temporary if you give it enough time, but how much longer until that day? I thought 2007 was bad. 2008 has been a bad year so far also.

Youth is wasted on the young. I don't want my youth back, but I don't want to feel like I am 85 years old right now either.

Messenger Café — open for fun 24/7. Hot games, cool activities served daily.

2007-08-09T11:15:00.000-05:00

I can remember when I was amazed by the first instant message systems on the Internet. Now they are interactive. If you have not yet seen this new one, click on the title and run your mouse over the page and see all the things this messenger has in addition to everything on the house menu. Technology expands way faster than any of us can keep up! This is pretty cool.

Tony vs. Paul! Best "stop motion video" I have ever seen made!

2007-08-09T11:11:00.000-05:00

New York, New York!

2007-08-01T22:23:00.000-05:00

Rodney and I flew to New York to see our son, Jeff and his wife Ginger. These are pictures of Jeff in Times Square, a picture of me and Rodney in Times Square, me coming out of Penn Station - we had taken the train from Long Island to NYC, and Madison Square Gardens. I think we took close to 300 pictures and I haven't been through them all yet! We only spent one day in NYC. The rest of the time we spent in the Hamptons. Hopefully I will be able to post some info about our time there also! Ever have one of those vacations that you need a vacation when you return home? This was one of those! I think it took me about 3 days to recover!

Senate rejects extra $300 million for Real ID

2007-08-01T21:45:00.000-05:00

Great news! In reference to The New World Order is Here, Congress recently has stalled this action. Click on the title and check it out!

The New World Order is Here

2007-07-09T11:40:00.000-05:00

Tribute to the Troops - Nickleback Double Feature

2007-07-03T06:21:00.001-05:00

Click on the title to see this awesome collection of pictures of our troops fighting in Iraq, set to the music of two songs by Nickleback.

4th of July - Meaning lost in 2007

2007-07-03T05:25:00.000-05:00

Frederick Douglass, the most influential African American of the 19th century, was asked to speak in New York and deliver an address regarding Independence Day in 1852. His speech is long, eloquent, but reminds his listeners that there is not freedom and independence for his own race, and, indeed, slavery lasted another 13 years after his speech. We throw the word "freedom" around way too much today. Freedom is becoming a precious and precarious concept in the 21st century.

If you read the ENTIRE Declaration of Independence numerous times and study it, you cannot help but see the irony of how far off base we are from what is set forth in that extensive document. The current Patriot Act is a direct violation of what the declaration sets forth when it declared war on Great Britian and declared that it would separate itself from a ruler when the founding fathers truly believed that man could govern himself and did not need a King. Checks and balances were put into place. The framers of the declaration - many of whom also wrote the United States Constitution and Bill of Rights, looked for less government and more independent freedoms for the citizens.

Today, we are not a government by the people and for the people, but a people being dictated to as to how to live our personal lives as well as our civic lives. Our tax system is unfair, our justice system is completely out of wack, our healthcare compared to other industrial nations is inferior, and we are the only industrial and technological country without national healthcare - given to all people and free. Worldwide we have the reputation of the school bully. I find this very disheartening.

America, for all its shameful past of the slaughter of the Native American population, and the horrific institution of slavery that lasted over 200 years here, somehow became the most wonderful country in the world. We helped, and still help so many other countries. We give and give and give. At the same time, we have been at war almost non-stop since Columbus landed in the West Indies. We are a warring country and always have been and maybe that's just what it takes to become a super power. But at some point, enough is enough.

The war in Iraq was supposed to last about 3 months. Now, as we go into our 5th year at war, there seems to be no end in sight. It is looking like another Korean or Vietnam war - those wars we simply cannot win. Will we stay in it for 20 years and have the casualties we did in Vietnam?

We have a statue that invites everyone "yearning to be free" called the Statue of Liberty, yet we are building a wall to keep Mexicans out. We need to make up our mind. We are a country built by and for immigrants. We need to take down the Statue of Liberty or change the wording, or we need to solve the immigration problem and debate. We cannot have our cake and eat it, too. Eventually someone strikes back, and unfortunately, that has happened to us. I fear it will get worse as we continue to alienate more and more countries each passing year.

It seems wrong to celebrate the 4th of July when we are celebrating a document that we have defied and denied as badly as we have already. And I am afraid it is going to get worse before it gets better.

Rodney's new ride....my biker babe!

2007-06-28T00:23:00.000-05:00

This is my husband, Rodney's, motorcycle. It is a Honda Shadow Ace 1100 American Classic Edition.

He has done everything but dip it in chrome! I tell him he has definitely "pimped his ride!"

He loves it and is currently on a solo road trip to Florida to visit his uncle.

I took a picture of him before he left with it loaded for camping on the road and for the 10 day trip.

Last summer he bought a new boat. He was in it every single day almost. Since he got this bike, I don't think he has taken the boat out a single day. Of course, it has been raining non stop this entire spring and summer so far! Not stopping him from riding though!

Are there any Einsteins left in the World?

2007-06-24T00:07:00.000-05:00

Albert Einstein said:

"Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity opinions which differ from the prejudices of their social environment. Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions."

and......

"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."

No question about the brilliance of this man....and what if he is right? We certainly are headed in the right direction to make his prediction true.

Bush's job approval rating drops to 26%

2007-06-23T23:59:00.000-05:00

June 22nd, 2007 2:37 pm
Bush's job approval rating drops to 26%

By Kenneth R. Bazinet / New York Daily News

WASHINGTON - President Bush's job approval rating has sunk so low that he could end up south of Richard Nixon's worst Watergate numbers.

Bush's approval rating dipped to a dismal 26% in the latest Newsweek poll released yesterday.

The handling of the Iraq war and uncertainty about the economy are the biggest drains for Bush, who could break all records for the worst presidential job-approval rating.

Bush has plummeted beneath his father George H.W. Bush's lowest approval rating of 29%, which came amid economic recession. Dubya even rates worse than Jimmy Carter did during the Iran hostage crisis of 1979-1980, when his support fell to 28%.

If the slide continues, Bush could challenge Nixon's lowest job rating of 23%, which came amid the Watergate scandal.

Bush peaked in early 2002, when his job approval rating in the Newsweek poll hit 83%, attributed to his handling of the early aftermath of the 9/11 attacks.

He's not the only pol with failing grades in Washington: Congress as a whole is faring even worse, with a 25% job approval rating, according to Newsweek.

SHINEDOWN performs for the troops in Iraq

2007-06-18T19:48:00.000-05:00

This is a great video of SHINEDOWN performing for the troops in Iraq. SHINEDOWN is one of my very favorite bands. You may think the video is over, but hang on - one of the guys does a song with the soldiers as the video fades out. I had trouble getting it to play correctly on this page, so...

Just click on the above title which will take you to my MY SPACE page and the video is there. Look for the video called "SHED SOME LIGHT" Click and play.

Definitely worth the watch to see the troops in their environment and it is a beautiful song.

I Took This Online Survey - you can too...

2007-06-14T01:50:00.000-05:00

You Are 76% Open Minded

You are so open minded that your brain may have fallen out!

Well, not really. But you may be confused on where you stand.

You don't have a judgemental bone in your body, and you're very accepting.

You enjoy the best of every life philosophy, even if you sometimes contradict yourself.

How Open Minded Are You?

2007-06-12T21:18:00.000-05:00

Check out Terrell's My Space Page - click here and add him to your friends list!

2007-06-12T10:39:00.000-05:00

My daughter works for Red Bull so I thought this was cool

2007-06-11T02:13:00.000-05:00

Cruising away.....

2007-06-10T15:09:00.000-05:00

Susan, Greg, and Rodney leave for their Saturday ride

Terrell Nedrow rode from near OKC and back to our house for the weekend.

A WEEKEND IN THE RECORDING STUDIO

2007-06-10T14:03:00.000-05:00

TERRELL NEDROW - singer/songwriter

southern rock/ with a "melloncamp" edge

Oklahoma has always produced tons of great musicians!

Friday night, our friends, Greg and Susan Nedrow, and their son, Terrell Nedrow, arrived, and the next day, while Rodney, Greg, and Susan took about a 7 hour bike ride through northeastern Oklahoma and the Lake Tenkiller area, me and Terrell worked in the recording studio laying down tracks and shooting videos and a periodically working on a photo shoot. A great deal was accomplished and much was learning by everybody in the process, but watch for a link to Terrell Nedrow, the musician, that will be coming soon.

Personally, I thought if we got 2 decent recordings to work with that it would be a productive studio weekend, but Terrell was relentless and worked 14 hours in the studio on Saturday alone, and layed down the tracks for 8 mp3s, and did the photo shoots during breaks. Rodney spent many hours with him working on mixing and recording Saturday night and Sunday, and I shot 4 different videos of him performing different songs.

Neither Terrell nor I are really happy with the videos yet, but for different reasons. I think I could shoot the videos better and he thinks he could sing the songs better, so we will keep on keepin' on until we get it where we are both happy with them. Neither of us really want to "settle" on anything but his best. And his best is really, really good as both a singer and as a guitarist.

We are never too old to learn new things, but sometimes we can be too young to appreciate certain things, so it was great to see how dedicated Terrell is to his music and that he is not just goofing around. His natural talent will pull him through as he learns more and more about the "music business" as he has always just been "all about the music." I also enjoyed having the company of really old friends - not saying THEY are old - well, we are all the same age, so I guess we are old. Depends on your perspective. But Greg and Susan are so easy to be around that the visits are entirely stress free and relaxing. (Well, except for the Terrell working me like a dog part....lol) I did manage to slip out of the studio about midnight when he and Rodney were jamming together on a few songs and go to bed. I believe they worked about 2 more hours in the studio before they shut it down for the night.

Rodney had a great time out on the road trip, spending time with Greg, his friend of 39 years, and with Susan, and I managed to get quite a few cool pictures that I hope to add to the website soon. Watch for more postings in the future about Terrell.

My Rant for June - LIARS

2007-06-08T04:27:00.000-05:00

There is probably nothing I hate worse than liars. All my life I have been plagued by them. It amazes me what people will lie about – from the smallest things to the most important things. People will lie when the truth would actually be more beneficial to them. I have been lied to and lied about all my life. You would think that, by now, I would expect it, or at the very least, not be so surprised by it when it happens. I am not sure which is worse either – being lied to, or being lied about. Probably the hardest thing to deal with is when you are lied to by people who you love, like family members, or by people who you think love you. Those hurt the worse.

But then there are people in the world who will lie ABOUT you due to some inferiority complex of their own. Those people really puzzle me. What is it they hope to gain? They know the truth. They know they are lying. They are the ones who have to live with the fact that they are simply outright liars. Do they find it easy to sleep at night knowing that they have lied about someone and possibly hurt them in some way?

Then there is the “white” lie. This is the one I am guilty of committing. It is hard to tell someone the truth if it will hurt them and does not matter in the long run. For example, if you have a friend who has been dieting for some time but you cannot tell that they have lost weight, but they ask you, “Can you tell I have lost 5 pounds?” Well, I may not be able to tell it but I will say, “yes” because they are excited about the loss, and though I may not see it, to be truthful and say that no, I cannot tell that they have lost weight, is just mean and discouraging. Another example would be if you are having dinner at someone’s home, and you do not really care for what they have served. If asked, I will lie and say it is delicious rather than tell them that I don’t like their cooking. Again, this is a white lie and is intended to avoid hurting someone over something trivial. It does not give me personal gain and it does not hurt them either.

But there is a HUGE difference between white lies and lies that are intended to cause harm to another person, and those are the kinds of lies I tend to have to endure. Some people will tell you they will always be there for you if you need them, but when you need them, they are no where to be found. Others will lie about you to a third party and sometimes that third party will believe them without gathering all the facts first. Of course, this is an error in reasoning called “jumping to conclusions” which is one of the most basic problems in critical thinking abilities. Some people will lie about you to cover up their own screw-ups or as a “red herring” in order to escape their underlying problem – whatever it may be. Sometimes, very immature people will band together to lie about someone, believing that there is safety in numbers. Their lies might even work for them, but then they have to deal with Karma.

One thing I do know is this: eventually liars are uncovered and pay the price, usually in a much more costly way than they ever imagined. No, the world is not a “fair” place, but I do believe that eventually the bad Karma they have created for themselves will return to them in some way. The problem is that many people are not smart enough to figure out why suddenly all these bad things are happening to them. All they really have to do is think back over their lives and ask themselves this question: did I lie about someone to such an extent that I caused them harm? If the answer is yes, then they might discover that it is time to learn the value of honesty. It is never fun to have to admit that you have not done the best you could, or that you were wrong, or that you made a bad decision, but sometimes you just have to own your own mistakes, admit them, and move on. But for some people, this is never an option. They would rather lie than tell the truth.

Hopefully, this will be my one and only rant of the month! I prefer the light hearted blog entries myself.

Holy Moly! He's cleaning up the shop!

2007-06-03T12:59:00.000-05:00

Generally, I am not much of a nag. However, when it comes to our 40x60 shop, I have, periodically, "suggested" that Rodney clean that place up! It is full to the brim with all his toys, a complete carpentry shop, machine shop, tractor, riding lawn mower, push mower, a variety of trimmers, his boat, trailer.....I think you get the picture. Had I known that buying a new motorcycle would motivate him to do this in order to make a whole new area just for bike parts and his mechanical toolbox and supplies, I would have told him to buy one much sooner!

He has been diligently at work on it for the past 3 days and the changes are already considerable. We have been storing things for family members for years and years which I really don't think they will ever come and get, so out they go! Looks like we will be having a garage sale soon too, as we have quite a few things of value which we do not want, but seem silly to just throw out.

Actually, I think he is cleaning out the shop right now because he is waiting for the MANY new items for his bike that he has ordered that should come in some time this week, and he is killing time while waiting by getting all of this done so that when they do come in, he can justifiably spend every extra hour working on his bike. Friends coming in next weekend with their bikes will be staying at the lake house when not out on rides and I am glad to see him getting this done.

Today, it's kudos to HR! Hope he doesn't run out of steam! Should I go help him?
Nahhhhhh..........

Bikers are Hot!

2007-06-02T00:16:00.000-05:00

Well, after all these years, and partially due to my personal attraction to bikers anyway, Rodney bought himself his first motorcycle in many, many years. Although he had always had them since about the age of 13, he had not for a really long time. Last week he bought a Honda Shadow Ace 1100 and he has been decking it out ever since. It is a beautiful bike and I will post pictures after he gets it "just so" as he is adding so many things and chrome wherever possible. We did take some before pictures which I will show with the NOW pictures once that is done.

So, why my reluctance when I generally like bikers, prefer biker bars when I go to cool towns like Eureka Springs or Bandera? It's all those idiots on cars who scare me. Not the bikers. My fears have nothing to do with his ability to ride. My fears are all about those people in automobiles who pull out in front of bikers and who tailgate bikers and who are too blind to even SEE bikers! He rides pretty much every day already and it is looking like some of our biker friends will be here next weekend and I am sure they will do at least a day trip if not an overnighter. For me, personally, after my motorcycle wreck with my brother-in-law, Steve, I am not up for this at this time. I don't mind him doing his thing and I like the people, but I will stick to automobiles....

Rodney "claims" he will be getting my name tattooed on his arm, but I will believe it when I see it! And if he does....I will definitely take a picture of it and post it on my site and my blog!

Sometimes a picture says it all!

2007-05-28T21:23:00.001-05:00

Rainy, rainy May

2007-05-27T13:04:00.001-05:00

Normally, I really enjoy living in an area that gets so much rain. Most of the time, the rains come gently and the sound is incredible as I sit out on my covered porch and watch the rain fall. However, this month it has rained nearly every single day. We have had a couple of storms, but nothing dramatic. Just rain, rain, and more rain. It's lost its romantic appeal and become more of a nuisance. I guess I really shouldn't complain since so many places really need rain, and I wish we could send them some of what we are getting, but it is starting to depress me! I crave a warm, sunshine filled day. I am sure I will write again in August - complaining about the countless days of heat and son and lack of rain, but today, I will just complain about the rain....

We were supposed to go to an outdoor concert at Lake Eufaula today, but looks like it will be cancelled due to the rain. We went out on the lake in the boat yesterday to hook up with the K-Hits folks (Tulsa rock station) since they were advertising my lake rental, but the weather was chilly and it rained off and on all day. The lake was surprisingly busy considering the weather. We didn't stay out on the water for very long.

Rain, rain, go away....come again some other day!

Shout out to GEN 300 Students @ UOP!

2007-05-18T23:56:00.000-05:00

One of the benefits of teaching at the University of Phoenix, as the nation's largest private, accredited university, is the variety of students that I get to meet. I have been with University of Phoenix for about four years now and have taught non-stop year round. I drive to Tulsa, Oklahoma, two nights a week and teach 4 hour sections for 5 weeks ( and I teach a great many directed studies courses) and it is highly accellerated, and students have to be highly motivated and disciplined to make it or they drop like flies. For almost two years I also taught flexnet (online) courses in addition to teaching on the Tulsa Campus. Well, since every 5 weeks at two classes per week, over the past 4 years I have had hundreds and hundreds - maybe thousands of students. You don't always get to know them like you do in a public traditional institution. However, I have a class that will end next Thursday night and the course is called Skills for Professional Development. (A course that many people I have known or worked with in the past really ought to try to take sometime!)

This class has been awesome. Everyone gets along great and has great attitudes; they are psyched up every class night; they turn all their assignments in on time; and treat each other with the greatest of respect and courtesy. We have had a lot of laughs for the past 4 weeks and I am going to miss them. Last week they did their powerpoint presentations about conflict resolution or team building issues. Every single one of them was unique and it was obvious that they had each put a great deal of time and effort into the presentations. I use Power Point for every class I teach rather than lecture notes, so I know how time consuming it can be to get them just the way you want them.

So...these kids got creative and had music, sound effects, humor, great transitions and custom transitions, and they knew their topics. It was great. Next week they will be presenting their team research papers and giving me a presentation that is a wrap of of the five intensive weeks of study. If last week was any indication of what to expect, then when that much creativity and ambition is combined on a team - watch out. I can't wait to see them. They also decided we are going to have a potluck dinner celebration. This is a class that I am really going to miss, but....as I told them all - they have probably not seen the last of me as I am certified to teach 34 courses and generally get the same students somewhere down the road in their program.

UOP shout out to Tim, Kelly, Julie, Wade, Jennifer, Chris, Toni, Giavanni, Paula, Bob Nelson, Burhan, Michael, Alex, Heather, Retina, Gianno, and Tammy.

Congrats to Greg & Susan Nedrow

2007-05-13T15:52:00.000-05:00

Rodney and I were fortunate enough on Saturday to be able to attend the wedding reception/party of our good friends, Greg and Susan, over in Wellston, Oklahoma. I have known Greg since 1970 and Rodney has known him a few years longer than that. We met Susan last year when they came out and spent a weekend with us. Susan was perfect and fit right into the old gang. Greg owns and runs a very successful print shop and Susan, like Rodney, is a CPA. So we all have a great deal in common. We also had the opportunity to meet the wives of a couple other people we have known since High School, Ray and Paul, and to plan a get-together some time this summer. This was a great party that started at 3 in the afternoon and went into the night. Catered meal, beautiful wedding cake, lots of interesting people and live music. Fort Worth musician, Danny Robinson, was awesome, and he played a wide variety of music. I greatly enjoyed listening to him and will be adding some pics to my gaylasgarden website. He played sometimes by himself and sometimes accompanied by others. Rodney got to jam with the other musicians and I even went up and did a song with them. But the day was really about Greg and Susan and it was a perfect day all around. It is really a wonderful feeling to watch two people so much in love. I think they are absolutely perfect for each other! They make each other happy - and that's what really matters. I believe this is an ideal marriage that will last forever.

I was most amazed with Greg's son, Terrell Nedrow - remember that name. This guy is young and already an amazing musician. I think you will be hearing more about him in the future. He has natural talent - which is rare, and is very comfortable on stage and interacts really well with the audience. He has a quick wit and a huge repertoire of songs already. Excellent guitarist and perfect lead singer to front a really good band. I predict he will go far in the music industry. I am hoping to help him out with this endeavor. He has the talent....he just needs a break! As I told him - we have to MAKE things happen. "Luck is preparation when it meets opportunity."

The Landlord (Will Ferrell)

2007-05-13T15:26:00.000-05:00

The Landlord

Check out my husband's new website!

2007-04-29T23:37:00.000-05:00

He finally did it! I have felt for years that Rodney should put up a website and he has been working diligently on it and it is now out there on the www. I worked with him on developing some of his graphics, logo, and as his content editor. I certainly could not write the content since the last thing I am is a CPA! It is a huge and amazing site. The only thing he has not written is an "about me" page. You know the old joke about CPA's. They are generally introverted and talk to you while looking at their own shoes. Not him! When he talks to you, he looks at YOUR shoes! So, I feel it is my duty to continue to harass him until he completes an "about me" page as he does have many hobbies and interests and collections that I think people would find quite interesting!

THE MASSACRE AT VIRGINIA TECH

2007-04-17T12:48:00.000-05:00

Having spent many years as a college faculty member, and also having a daughter who lived on campus when she was in college, violence on college campuses has always been a particular concern of mine. I have read several books that discuss college campus violence, security measures, security systems, faculty training, and all other aspects of minimizing possible violence. There appear to be two questions that the media are focused on at this point. First, could more have been done to prevent this from happening? And second, did the university act appropriately after the first incident occurred early that morning?

With a student population of 26,000 plus a faculty and staff of another 10,000 people, there is bound to be violence. Comparing this to a city of this size, even the largest, best trained, and efficient police department could never have stopped this event from occurring. When a disturbed person like 23 year old Cho Seung-Hui decides to go on a killing rampage and can carry everything he needs in a backpack, how can this be prevented? We live in an uncertain world. This type of violence can happen anywhere, at anytime, for any reason. Have we come to the point that we need gun detectors on EVERY SINGLE BUILDING in the United States? And even if we did that, a disturbed person can open fire outside anywhere at any time. We saw this with the Tulsa shootings from an overpass on a turnpike. How can those types of incidents be stopped? They can only be stopped after there are deaths and the police can finally track them down and arrest them. It is impossible to watch and regulate 3 million people, 24/7.

However, this particular student should have been on a watch list. He was a senior and an English major. His writings in his Creative Writing class were so disturbing that his teacher turned them over to the counseling department. So was he being watched? The teacher obviously saw him as dangerous. Having taught Creative Writing for years, I have seen some disturbing writings, but never anything that indicated a psychopathic personality or I would have done the same as his teacher did. As this story continues to unravel, there may be many factors that will come to light that will help explain why he did what he did, although that will be of absolutely no comfort to the families of the victims. America is a violent nation. It always has been, and a study of our history clearly indicates exactly how violent we are as a people. I wish I had an answer to this problem, but I simply don’t. My concern is that we will give up yet more of our own personal freedoms in our desperation to be “safe” in an unsafe world. I do not believe it is possible to prevent everything that can happen in the modern world.

Regarding the Virginia Tech’s response to the events, I must say that I am very disappointed. From the moment of the first shooting at 7 am, the entire campus should have been on lockdown and all students notified to stay where they were, with doors locked. Security and police should have been immediately brought in – full force, and I also believe that this delay resulted in the mass murder that ensued. When the shootings occurred at the Fort Gibson School in Fort Gibson, Oklahoma, I was teaching at a college campus about 4 miles away and even though this had not occurred on our campus, we immediately went into lockdown mode. Virginia Tech administration should have assumed the worst – that there could be more than one killer on campus. Had they not learned anything from the Columbine school shooting? How could they possibly make the decision that it was an isolated incident? They keep saying that they were acting on what limited information they had at that time. Well, that is exactly my point. They did not have enough information and it is better to be safe than sorry. Lock down the campus and figure it out later is much better than allowing innocent people to continue about their day, believing that they were being protected by the security measures in place at their school. I believe in the days and weeks to come that their responsibility for making a very bad judgment call will haunt them. Personally, if I had a child going to school there, I would pull them out of that college based on this incident alone.

My heart goes out to the families of the victims of this horrible tragedy.

The Red Hatters Party at my Getaway!

2007-04-14T21:42:00.000-05:00

If you don't know what The Red Hat Ladies Club is, then you don't know about women over 50 who know how to have a good time! 7 Red Hatters and 2 Pink Hatters (under 50) just spent a few days at my lakeview getaway house. They are on the go ALL THE TIME! I don't see where they get the energy, but they certainly have it. I don't know the ages of the pink hatters, but the oldest of my guests was 86. I worried about them on Friday night. I waited up until 1:30 am before they showed back up! And the next morning, they were up and at it again! These are amazing women with tons of energy who know how to enjoy life to the fullest. Come to find out, they nearly got kicked out of Denny's at midnight because they were so rowdy! What a great bunch of women and by the way, Vanda, my dad is already taken!

Way too many irons in the Fire!

2007-04-09T21:46:00.000-05:00

Okay, I will admit it. I have WAY too many irons in the fire! I don't even meet myself coming or going. A bit of advice here....never start two major new businesses at exactly the same time. Or, let me put it another way - know your limits. No one handed me more than 24 hours in the day, but I do have that tendency of biting off a bit more than I can chew! My schedule book is almost impossible for me to keep up with. I do not have a clone.

Here's the thing. I moved way out here in the country on the lake to RELAX. I taught full-time at a community college. Then I started also teaching for the University of Phoenix. All I did was teach, drive, grade and do prep. I had no life. So, without going into details as to why I quit my full-time job (that's one heck of a soap opera in itself!), I thought I would have more "free" time to take on some projects I had wanted to do for a long time. And I did. I just should have done them one at a time.

For those of you old enough, "Calgon! Take me away." If you didn't get that, you are not a baby boomer.

Dead Beat Dads

2007-04-08T01:25:00.000-05:00

Dead beat dads. Who needs them? THEIR CHILDREN. I have personally not received a dime in child support from my children's biological father (or as they now call him - the sperm donor) since 1987. I was lucky. I was educated and I married a wonderful man who became the man they call "dad" and love dearly. Not all women are as lucky. So, does that let him off the hook? NO.

Sometimes they don't pay because they can't seem to hold down jobs, are alcoholics, drug addicts, in prison, or are just plain losers. But some, who own their own businesses, like mine does, CHOOSE not to pay in an effort to punish the mother - their ex-wife. What they don't realize, or if they do, they just don't care, is that who it hurts the most is the children. The children deal with severe abandonment issues that carry into adulthood. The children see it as a rejection of them, personally. Even though I have told mine time and again that it is not their fault, that he is trying to punish me and not them, and that it does not necessarily mean he does not love them (somehow in his own way - okay, I am doing my best to give him the benefit of the doubt here), but none of that matters to the children. They still take it as a personal rejection from their father. My children are adults now - 26 and 30 years old, and neither of them have yet married and are both very leary of marriage and I do believe a great part of that has to do with the emotional scars caused by their dead beat dad.

On the other hand, my husband of the past 17 years has a son who he always paid his child support for, exercised ALL his visitation rights, and has kept a good relationship with his son throughout the years. This son is now 25, happily married, and has none of the abandonment issues that my children have dealt with since they were 4 and 8 years old. The difference a father makes in the life of a child is tremendous. Anyone who thinks that as long as they have a mother they will be just fine is wrong. Sure, there are exceptions to this, but I have learned over the years how very critical the relationship between father and child is to the development of the personality of all children. When I was a single mom, I had to be both mom and dad and it was hard. I don't know how we made it through those times, but we did. I am very close to my children and I actually pity my ex because he has really missed out and that time can never be recovered. Their childhood is long gone and they now live their own lives and he has no place in it. I could not imagine my life without my children in it.

So, if the intent to punish the mother was the reason for non-payment, it worked. I have been punished for over 20 years now by the sadness and abandonment that they have felt because of him. Nothing hurts a mother more than seeing her children hurt. We made it without him, but he still has an obligation to fulfill his debt and that never goes away. What I wonder most about dead beat dads is this: how do they sleep at night? I am very maternal. I cannot even imagine going through life NEVER seeing my children, not knowing who they are as people, not spending time with them, never knowing if they are hurt, dead or alive, not getting that hug and kiss or that call asking for advice or telling me some exciting news.

No Christmas or birthday cards or presents for all those years. No requests to see them or expressing any interest in seeing them. Moving around to avoid my attempts to collect child support must have been very expensive and tiring! When my kids turned 18, I told them that as long as I had their biological dad's address and phone number that any time they wanted to contact him, all they had to do was ask. I encouraged it. I thought it could help heal the scars they carry with them. But they have a dad who has raised them and loved them and been there for then through the good times and the bad times, and they pretty much say to me about their "sperm donor" the following: "I don't even KNOW him. Why would I want to have contact with him?" Although I can understand and respect their feelings, there is still a part of me that believes that if there was a chance of reconciliation, that they could heal the scars he caused by stabbing that knife of abandonment deep into the core of their very being. In other words, I would like them to have the opportunity to FORGIVE him in their hearts so that they could feel better in THEIR hearts. Unfortunately, neither of them has the slightest interest in him at all. Now that they are adults, there is simply nothing that I can do about that. They now make all their own decisions in life.

Their careers, their friends, their sense of humor, their interactions with each other, their dreams, philosophy of life, their beliefs, their accomplishments and failures - everything that goes with the raising of children, he has missed. He does not know them as people at all.

Dad beat dads miss ALL that and more. The children of dead beat dads eventually stop loving that missing parent, or go even further, and grow to hate him. That is not good for them either. Hatred in the heart hurts THEM - not the dead beat dad. He doesn't care.

Dead beat dads are the most pitiful of creatures. In the end, they hurt not only their children, but themselves as well. I can sleep at night because I have ALWAYS been there for my children. I wonder if he can? I wonder HOW he can...

Click on the dead beat dads label under this post to see how you can find that dead beat dad and hold him responsible for his obligations to his children.

Scarlett Johansson -Speed Painting - this blew my mind!

2007-04-07T02:13:00.000-05:00

I am in the middle of re-creating my blog!

2007-04-06T22:36:00.000-05:00

Those of you who have been here before may have noticed that things are missing or different. That is simply because I ACCIDENTALLY deleted my entire blog. Fortunately, my friend, Lesbianca, who had been helping me learn how to do this, and who knows me quite well, had just so happened to have saved all my postings in March. So, because of her, I was able to retrieve them. Anything I wrote after April 1, however, is gone, gone, gone. I know, for example, that I had posted one day about how Lesbianca, once my student, had now become my teacher. After this debacle, she saved some postings that I was particularly upset to have lost. To her, I am very grateful. She is awesome! So....here I go again. Trying to get it back as much as I can the way I had it before, but some things are lost forever. However, to borrow a cliche - when one door closes, another one opens. I bet I don't delete it again!

Finding Gutenberg - I love dumb successful people! Edison lived from 1847-1931. Gutenberg invented the printing press in 1450.

2007-04-06T22:01:00.000-05:00

What has happened to Americans?

2007-04-06T21:54:00.000-05:00

What has happened to America? Or, more specifically, what has happened to Americans?

The preamble to our Constitution states that we have the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Would someone explain to me how so many Americans die due to lack of medical care while illegal immigrants get it free? Why can’t we have a national healthcare system? Would someone explain to me who changed the definition of liberty? We are a country of “NO’S.” No smoking, no loitering, no trans fats in any foods in New York and soon it will be nationwide. “No, no, no” has become our national anthem. What’s next? Try to order a dessert at a restaurant and they make you step up on a scale first to determine if you are ALLOWED to have it? After all, obesity is a huge problem in this country and costs us so much in healthcare just like tobacco does. As time passes, rules keep being made by whoever “they” are. Like little ants, we all blindly follow the leader. Will we follow him to our own doom? If they stick their head in the oven, will we do that too?

And happiness. What is that? The pursuit of happiness comes with a set of rules that I cannot begin to fathom. Happiness is allowed only if you conform to some accepted national standard of behavior and anyone who steps out of that little box is labeled odd, or gay, or the wrong color, and persecuted and, therefore, denied their pursuit of happiness.And then, of course, there are those political and religious agendas. Everyone seems to have one. Unfortunately, they all seem to want to share theirs with me when I never asked for them in the first place.

One of our rights, as Americans, is freedom of religion. I never tell people what to believe or if I agree with their religious beliefs because, as an American citizen, I recognize that freedom and respect it. However, other “so-called” Americans do not seem to understand this concept and preach to me how they are right and everyone else is wrong and if I don’t believe it, then I am going straight to hell. Well, I guess I will have a great deal of company if that is true. I have lost track of the hundreds of religious denominations and cults out there. Or could they all be right?Many people deny other people their American rights based on their personal religious beliefs which is, if you think about it, a direct violation of the United States Constitution. If there is freedom of religion, doesn’t it apply to ALL Americans? I know the Constitution pretty well, and I have yet to see anything in it that states that any particular religion has dominion over another in the United States or that it should even be a factor in the governing laws of the land.

One of the great beauties of a democracy is the ability to vote. I am a voter. I research before I vote. I don’t vote a particular party – I vote the candidate on the issues. I am also really tired of the political propaganda – doesn’t matter which party – that clogs my inbox, whether it is from strangers or family members. The thing is that these emails are rampant with incongruities, lies, distortions, illogical reasoning, emotional or logical fallacies, misinterpreted statistics, or are just downright stupid.Isn’t it bad enough that the Internet loads our inboxes with a variety of sex ads, medications, the same tired, old email jokes that we have gotten hundreds of times, the get rich quick schemes, etc… without us also being assaulted by our own friends and relatives with their forwards on religious and political propaganda? If I pulled one hair out for each one of these that I receive, I would be totally bald by now.

I have a very simple political agenda (throw out the two party system and vote in a SMART party of the most brilliant minds in all areas of our knowledge base) and a religious belief which I won’t be sending out in a mass email to everyone in my address book. Perhaps NOT sending out my own personal religious and political beliefs could start a trend of others NOT doing it either.That’s just my opinion and I could be wrong, but this is MY blog, so I get to say what I want!

Thank God we still have freedom of speech. Oh wait. I forgot. “They” are trying to take that away too

Jason L. Miller states it so well!

2007-04-06T21:50:00.000-05:00

Jason Miller, writer for Webpro News, wrote in his insider report yesterday on what he called Marketing to Madness, the following:

The problem with the human condition is that it involves humans. Bringing that condition online, fostering it with the Wisdom of Crowds philosophy, is slowly but surely proving what philosophers have said since humans first learned to write: the anonymous mob is powerful and passionate, but no more rational than an angry swarm of bees.

Jason, I have to agree with you.

Good news - bad news

2007-04-06T21:38:00.001-05:00

Well, the good news is that a former student of mine just called me to tell me he would be the chef at a new upscale restaurant on Fort Gibson Lake. He even invited me and Rodney for a free meal on opening day. Very sweet guy. But here is the bad news. Having considered this since 1999, I finally decide, after much research, that there is simply not enough lodging on this lake for the amount of people who come. Too many end up in hotels in the surrounding towns and driving with their boats back and forth every day.So....I spend a few thousand dollars fixing up a 1600 sq ft house with lake view and I am ready to open and have my first customers coming on April 13. This student informs me that this restaurant is 10,000 sq ft and there will be dozens of upscale cabins and rentals with several swimming pools, hot tubs, fitness center, etc... How can I compete with that? I can offer seclusion and an entire home for their use, but not any of the other amenities that they will have. I do believe in healthy competition, but I don't think I can compete with a 400 acre resort complex that close to me. What's an entrepreneur to do?
Posted by Gayla of Gayla's Garden at 8:26 PM 1 comments

How can my child be 30 years old?

2007-04-06T21:32:00.000-05:00

What a wakeup call for me. My son turned 30 years old and it seems to me that I was just 30 about five minutes ago. How does time fly that quickly? Yesterday, it seems, I was running kids to various activities, or looking for better daycare. In the blink of an eye, so it seems, I realized that my nest has been empty for 8 years now. Doesn't seem like it at all. My days still seem super busy although I only work part time teaching for the University of Phoenix in Tulsa. How did I cope with the old empty nest syndrome? Diversification! I also own a lake vacation rental and am in the process of opening an online store for interior decorating. I also have totally revamped my website recently, and have many new pages in the works. I can stay on the computer all day and night. I have to admit that I never paid much attention to blogs until my friend, Lesbianca, started her blog and I have been reading it for the past two years. Hers is really nice looking and I will be hitting her up for advice real soon to make mine better. Until I have something worth saying, I will sign off with just this - take time to smell the roses. Time flys. You have a baby and then you wake up and he is a 30 year old man - and I never knew 30 years could go so swiftly by.